| Note Me
Hello, Deviantart, watchers, passerbys and invisible stalkers,Let me start off and say this is not a rant journal, this isn't a call out, or anything of the sort. This journal is a attempt to be inspirational to anyone and everyone, if you don't want to read it, you don't have to.
I guess this could be considered a rant? So if you don't want to read, don't, no harm done.
I just want to say, that I am happy here, this group of friends, which keep growing, everyone is happy, for the most part, there is drama here and there. But, its friends, and the internet is an outlet area.
I have noticed that people do say a lot they are not proud of their work often, or that they might quit drawing, or even they hate what they draw.
Honestly, I understand all of these examples, and then some, personally, I hate my work and I have always considered quitting for good, and never pick up a pen, because for years and years, I have been told over and over that I wont make it in the art world, concept artist's world, writers worlds, or even in the creative industry in general. These are often brought up over my procrastination, depression, anxiety and other mental conditions that I suffer from on a daily.
These comments have come from parents, friends, family, teachers, tutors and even boyfriends/girlfriends, and its only just recently that I have began to let go of the past for the present and future.
Now some of you will probably be like "I'm sorry for what you went through
" or "I honestly didn't know/see it from you
", first off, I am not telling you not to be concerned or never say those things, I like the fact people care about us, however, I won't change what happened, though it is terrible, I have been through my fair share. I have been hit, physically and mentally used, though without those things, I wouldn't be here, nor would I be like I am, or have learned the things I have, so I can help other people and warn others of things like that. Or even give out speeches like this. I have given speeches like this to some people in the past and it will remain personal to them. This is a generalization, for people from everywhere and anywhere to read.
Now that I have explained myself for some reasoning I shall continue. Do note its not targeted. I was planning on doing inspirational journals every now and then for people.
I hate my work still, I hate my old work and I cringe hard when people refer to pages in my gallery filled with older art work, even if its like a year old. But something people have asked, "Why haven't you deleted them then?
", well, that is because even though I hate them so much and I cringe because I was weeabo trash, and my style was cringe worthy. I am proud of somethings to it. It wont be the actual drawings, it never is. Truly, when I am proud of something, its due to emotional reasoning and progress.
What I mean by emotional reasoning, is that I can see from my humor, my actions, choice of wording, people I have associated with and befriended, I have made small impacts in peoples worlds, be it a thank you, a short conversation or becoming internet friends, doing art work for them and them being flustered and thanking me.
I really value people, which is where my anxiety sprouts from, I value conversations, I value memories, which is why I rarely remove images and comments. I leave everything as it was. Because every memory, bad or good, if I helped someone, or made an ass of myself. Both of us grew and got closer. I have made people happier, even a little. I am proud of it.
Not only that, I have the progress proud-ness, which might be self explanatory, I leave my work up, because I get people complementing me on it, and how they aren't good enough, or that they are scared of me, because I am "So good
". I, when I was younger, was atrocious at art, but I didn't let that factor get to me, I didn't let my art teacher get to me, when she told me I couldn't draw, or wasn't allowed to draw and I should trace. Or when my Ex told me I wasn't good enough. My parent's told me my work was too disturbing and I should do something else.
Which is why I tell everyone, any age, any race, gender, whatever:
Never give up, no matter what
Don't ever let the world stop you
Life is hard now
But passion, emotion and will are strong things to have
Everyone has those things, don't be afraid to do what you love
You are not here to please other people
You are here for YOU
I have been told I should paint, draw flowers, butterflies, draw for children's books, draw for newspapers, draw one shot comics, write children's comics, do speeches, draw more cute things, draw like this artist, draw like this style more etc.
But you know what, if someone doesn't like what you like to do, be it drawing, sketching, painting, making bracelets, furnishings, comics, sculpting and writing, there are so many things to list, but if you want to do something, just do it.
Don't expect to be a famous artist.
Don't expect to gain money or fans, or even earn a living.
Just make what you are good at
Just make what you want to do
Sometimes what you are good at and what you want to do are two different things.
I am good at art, I know that now. But if you must know, my true passion, my true reason and want, its science, theory, its concepts and idea making. I love biology, I love theology, I love astrology!
And I'll be damned if someone told me again that I am not smart enough or good enough. Because now, I will flip them the bird and tell them to get a life, I am, I'm following what I enjoy.
Follow what you enjoy, and mix it with what you are good at.
Biology and drawing, I love anatomy and making sense of anatomy. Which is why I excelled at concept and at science. I am an A student after all.
Find something you enjoy, and do it
Then when you are comfortable, and you want to make it so you can earn something, do NOT
adapt to the field, you will be unhappy. What you should do is find the gap, what you produce is always unique to the artist. We all have different styles, we all have different tastes, cultures, inspirations. And it shows.
Find the gap in the market.
Is there a horror writer that does what I do?
Is there a concept artist who includes this detail?
Never give up
You are worth it and your life is your own
Do what you love
Because its a beautiful thingNever be ashamed of what you do
Never be ashamed of what you want
There is not another one of you